So it looks like I'll be competing against 3 people for the promotion in my own damn job. What will I do about this?

Deciding that I had better prepare myself for disappointment and decide what I am going to do to overcome it. I've done it before, I can do it again. It's not what I want to do, but sometimes life doesn't go the way you hoped and it's better to get up and do something about it rather than lay down and sob over it. I refuse to be a victim, I will use everything that happens as an opportunity to find the better option hiding somewhere else.

In other words, if they give it so someone else, I'm finding somewhere else to work hard.

The last couple weeks have been a bit hellish. Ryan chose to adopt 2 kittens, a concept I was less than thrilled with. I love cats, don't get me wrong, but kittens are always a task of wholly different proportions. As I suspected, they have turned out to be an immense amount of energy and work. And, of course, they are in less than great health being that they came from a hoarder house. So...three different medications every day for UTI, diarrhea, and upper respiratory infection. To compound this delight, one of the kittens is yet too small to be fixed and thus took to piddling on our bed, likely marking behavior. Bless the tabby, who was fixed and is doing much better, and God forbid...knows how to use the litter box.

Strange....after these last 2 weeks I feel markedly less intimidated by the thought of having children. We still have no place for them since we're still caught in the brother-and-mother-living-in-house bind, but hopefully we will get our asses in gear and have that addressed in the next 12-24 months. Hopefully...I love that word...so non-committal yet so optimistic. Only time will tell if reality will meet ideal on that whole, giant 2 ton elephant in the room.

Aside from the above dramatics, I anxiously await my fate at work with the prospective promotion to the advising director. All signs point to....who the hell knows when things will become clear. I'm sortof' trying to shift that simmering pot to the back burner as I can see expeditiousness is not the operation on that front. It's hard to be patient, though, as the news there will have a profound impact on my life for the next 2-3 years.

Oh...what else is there? This is starting to develop into a narcissistic rant, huh? I suppose I just feel the intense urge to spew my stressors of late, which is healthier than suppressing them.

Oh, right, and with all the matters pressing upon me, suffice to say that relationship status has been strained as we are both a bit scrambled. I know..I know....shit happens and either you get through it or you don't.

Oh, and there's a conspicuously clicking and grinding right knee mixed in with all of this. Residuals of my last, disastrous ski day in which said knee met swiftly with the edge of ski, leaving hideous bruise for several weeks and gradually evolving pain and stiffness. I find that when I scale stairs, my knee now makes a loud click, as though I had a prosthesis below my thigh. Very strange and uncomfortable, but beyond home care I am not motivated to get it examined right now.
I'll cross that bridge when I get a chance to breathe with all this other shit.

>Phew<

There's my ventilation. I feel marginally better now. Back to work.

A dear friend passed last night after over a decade of fighting cancer. I was blessed to be present when she left us all, there are few more profound gifts one can receive than to see one off in their final moments.
Bridgette was a truly astounding woman who was brave enough to honor her true self every day, and to gather friends in her life who also honored her. She remained humorous and bright until the end.